Hello there.
I’d hoped I’d see you again. You may not remember my face, and you may not even remember my name, but I remember your lies–every single one of them.
I remember those searing pieces of deception that tried to cling to my spirit and sink me into the rejection of my greatest self.
I remember how easily you summed up the magnitude of my potential–how you stared it straight in the eye and spit on it and turned your back and laughed.
I had begun to tremble under the weight of your logic.
Your words of wisdom and reason began to make sense and stripped away precious parts of my faith.
Sometimes fiercely,
and sometimes with very little fanfare.
You didn’t always give it much thought because to you I wasn’t someone who required you to sit up and pay attention.
And as you dismissed the phenomenon of me, every one of your unspoken lies communicated your deception. You told me I’d fail.
Over and over again you said that my dreams would amount to ashes. . .
That my drive was a fireless flame that would burn itself out into dust.
You convinced me that I would remain invisible and that if I were even remembered at all, it would be as a weak wind. You stared straight into my heart and spoke your confusion. Not always with your words, or your actions, but with every assumption that dismissed the wholeness of my worth and expected me to be less than I really am.
If I were to be honest, I’d have to admit that I’m so glad that I have the chance to see you again. You may not remember my face and you may not even remember my name. But I recognize yours.
I know it well. If you had your way, you’d thrust me in and clip my wings. You’d have me gagged so that the world would never hear the fervor of my song. And so you would thrive and be fed upon the withering of my rise.
I don’t blame you. I see it all clearly. I thank God for speaking into my soul and revealing the truest angles of your expression. And so I know now why you lashed me and criticized the tenderness of my hopes. I know why you tried to make me believe that I would fail. I finally know your secret:
With your infinite faces and names and temperaments.
With your countless tactics and attempts to shake my resolve.
You were my training ground.
And you were sent to make me a battle tested champion.
So thank you. You’ve done your job well. And I intend to do mine. For just as I remember you and all the things you tried to do. . .
I AM the chiseled stone cast in a lake and the unyielding ripple that expands outward and onward into the blue.
I AM one with the glittering beam that infiltrates the shadow and dissolves the darkness of doubt and pain.
I AM the dreamer of a good dream. I AM she who builds bridges and bounty in a very real world: My world–a world that brings life and hope through love.
I am all the things I’ve ever perceived myself to be in beauty and brilliance, and all the things you said I could never be.
So it has been settled.
Whether you agree to my relevance…understand that in all directions of my being. . .it has been settled.
Every step that I take into my destiny belongs to me and my Creator. Every piece of art that I create with my glorious palette belongs to me and the One that fortifies the bristles of my brush. Every decision that I make to continue into the horizon belongs to me and the force of unconditional love that planted me upon the hills.
It belongs to the impact I make today and the victory that waits for me in my tomorrow.
So it is okay that you may not remember my face, and that you may not even remember my name.
Because in time, you will. You will never forget it.