Menu
The Unsalesperson: Sell Without Turning off Your Buyer
By: Cara Beth Wiley
I never in my wildest dream had any desire to sell or any intention of becoming a salesperson. As a child, I spent hours and hours outside…building forts, riding bikes, swimming…finding patches of moss to do gymnastics on, building small houses out of scraps of wood while my Dad built our new house.
Dad, was a salesperson. He wore nice suits, drove new company cars, and drove off to cities far away and sold computer “stuff” to companies. He was outgoing, charming, and seemed to make magic happen every day. It all sounded very complex, but he loved and it and made it look easy.
I was an introvert, and liked to spy on people and listen. When my sister and I were little we would hide under the big dining room table and record the family at big gatherings. We would giggle and they would discover us. We loved playing back the recording so they could hear it.
Sometimes our earliest impressions of an idea or a concept are deep seeded and long-lasting.
It was the year 2000 when a friend presented to me the opportunity to be part of her team in direct sales. I thought she may have lost her mind. She had her Master’s degree in counseling, and we had worked together at our last job. She called me at work, while my phone was lighting up with the usual 100 plus calls a day in my mental health admissions job. She wanted to show me more about this thing she was doing. I was already working full-time, overtime, and a second side job in mental health to try and make ends meet. In one of those brief moments when you take a leap of blind faith, I agreed to meet her. I said “meet me for lunch before I change my mind”.
We met at the park, and she mentioned she was earning a few hundred dollars a week extra doing parties. It sounded great, but I had no idea how I was going to sell anything to anyone. Let alone stand up in front of people.
Off I went to a training party to observe Karen do her thing. I started sweating when I saw how knowledgeable and comfortable she was in front of people. She was putting on a full show and entertaining everyone. My thoughts were…..
”Yikes, there is no way. I can’t do that.”
I slipped out of there as soon as I could and went home to contemplate. Then a thought came to me.
What if I could find a way to do it my way, and STILL be successful? Hmmm…
I began to go to the trainings and meetings that were held locally. My distributor was amazing, perceptive, and knew how to work with all skill levels. The training she provided was some of the best in the industry. By some miracle, a coworker of mine said she would have a party.
I nearly fell over.
At that first party I put into practice things that have helped me draw upon for years to come. I did what I COULD do. I showed the small crowd the products and talked about a few of them. I made sure they had fun. I let them know, I was nervous and they were wonderful. 3 people booked their own parties from that night.
No one cared that I didn’t know what I was doing. It simply wasn’t important. I learned to make it about THEM and the rest worked itself out.
In 6 months I was able to replace my full-time income, leave my job, and take our children out of daycare. In the process I had earned my first bonus check, a cruise to the Bahamas, and a company car. Really!
Today as a Leadership Coach for a direct selling global company, I coach others on how to build their businesses. Many of our coaching conversations come down to words. Words are the most important thing in a sales business. Most people do not have the natural words to get in a comfortable selling conversation. Many struggle to make simple every day conversation with people they meet casually.
Images of needing to be pushy, aggressive, loud, can be in the heads of both the seller and the potential customer. It’s important to simply have basic conversations with others so you can build that rapport.
First, there is the crafting of your own story. It’s important to be able to convey to a potential customer or team member, what brought you in to the industry you are in, and why, and what is it that keeps you going each day. Know where you started, and where you are now, and why. It takes practice.
Your passion comes through in your story, and connects you to others.
[tweetshare tweet="The art of selling is the art of connecting. --Cara Beth Wiley"]
It’s possible when people believe they can’t sell, they are missing key steps in conversations.
To connect you must listen first. Listening with questions, is the key to conversational selling.
99% of sales and recruiting comes down to listening. Make It About Them.
The average salesperson falls in to the “telling trap”. “You should try this product because.” “Join my team because”. “Buy this because”. It’s not their fault, it’s simply an untrained reaction.
Then there is the “I” trap. One of my biggest mentors taught early to take the “I” out of the business. By that, she meant in selling presentations, product demos, training videos and more; replace the word “I” with YOU. I watch for that at every presentation I am in the audience for. Too many “I”’s and the audience falls asleep. Make it about them, and they lean in and engage.
As I went on over the next 10 years building 2 businesses in direct sales, I would start many of my trainings with the idea that we were going to talk about how to be a Un-Salesperson. How to sell without selling. I would see the people smile, start to relax, their shoulders came down out of their ears, and they would begin to take notes.
Keep It Simple Silly or K.I.S.S. some practices to incorporate as you are developing your Un-Salesman approach:
Practice conversations wherever you go.
Those conversations do not have to lead to your product or business. Take the pressure off. Leave your business card, catalog, etc. in your bag. If the topic comes up, and it feels right, then share. If a connection is made you can share contact information. If not keep going.
Strive to be a rock star listener.
This is where you will learn so much about the other person. Use open ended questions that start with If, Tell me, How, or When to get the ball rolling. Most of the conversation should be coming from your prospect, not you.
Be A Brand Ambassador.
Practice a 30 second testimonial about what brought you to the business, what your passionate about, and why. Keep it short, craft it, and share it. Practice and practice.
Connect first. Sell later.
Speak to potential customers, leads, etc. on the phone as if you are already friends. Smile when you are on the phone, and in person. Amazing results can happen.
Before you sell, make it all about them.
When you position yourself in a helping stance versus a selling stance it takes away any need you have on your end. It’s all about how you can help that person, that company, that prospect.
Have FUN with your business.
When you enjoy the company you represent, the products, people, and process there is no stopping you. You create your own positive energy and people want to be part of that. Your belief needs to be bigger than any doubters around you.
Move beyond the zone.
Be willing to go out of your comfort zone a little bit at a time. Amazing things will happen, trust me.
You can embrace selling with these practices and enhance your current career or start a new one!
You are amazing!
Share this Post
MEET THE WRITER
Cara Beth Wiley
Cara is from NH and has been a creative writer since she was a child. She attended Plymouth State College and earned a BA in Psychology. She lives with her husband and daughter in NH. She is a mother of 3, and a first time Grandma. Her work experiences in mental health, direct sales, and as a sales coach inspire writing ideas in many areas. Over the past year she has been learning copywriting, and advertising in addition to creative writing.
RECENT POSTS
Array
